Hey, check it out! (In)famous Disney blogger Kevin Yee just wrote a big article about broken WDW effects, with a whole section dedicated to me!
It's weird to read, though. Some of it gets into all my personal medical issues and stuff. Isn't that supposed to be HIPPA-protected or something? I'm going to call my engineers and sue! (Do I even have engineers anymore?)
Anyway, Kevin theorizes that I might be getting limited movement at some point. (What, are they getting me a Hoveround?) He's already calling the concept Marionette Yeti. Whatever, dude. I've got no strings to hold me down!
I'm putting the Blue Fairy on speed dial right now, just in case.
One of the "joys" of working for Disney is interacting with the guests.
Folks, I don't know how to break this to you, but people are stupid. Sure, if you're reading this blog, then you're probably not one of the stupid ones. But the masses out there... they're hopeless. There's even a whole website dedicated to them: StupidGuestTricks.com.
I don't interact with guests much these days. (I spend my time, um... hanging around.) But I used to, before I got transferred. Nothing quite fit. At the Haunted Mansion, they told me I was too "scary." On Jungle Cruise, I kept breaking through the boats. And when I worked PAC (that's "parade audience control" for you guests) and someone wouldn't stop crossing in front of the parade, I'd just eat them. (Come on, you know you've always wanted to.) Everest came as the first good fit for me... one where being a yeti came in handy, and where I didn't have to smile and tell guests to have a "magical" day after they cussed me out.
So in honor of the cast members who deal with stupid guests every day, here's another talking animal video someone sent me of their true tales from The Great Movie Ride.
(Yes, people really say all these things. No lie.)
At Harry Potter World Land, people pay 3 bucks for a soda and 30 bucks for a stick. And they're happy about it.
Black magic? Drugs in the water? Maybe. But Universal also discovered the big secret to marketing in theme parks: People want to be inside their favorite movies, in that land where all the phone numbers start with 555 and nobody looks at the road while they're driving. And if you faithfully recreate that experience for them, they'll happily pay through the nose.
Although you may want to wear gloves before handling people's nose-money. Just saying.
Disney can charge you insane prices for a bottle of water and you pay it because you don't have any choice. Meanwhile, you mutter under your breath about evil corporate suits and their money-grubbing ways. (Just remember, they're using that money to maintain their best attractions! Oh, wait.)
But at the Wild Wonderful Wooly Wizarding Something Something World of Harry Potter, people will pay anything for a mug of "butterbeer" soda, and they're thrilled. Why? Because it's butterbeer! It's unique! It's what wizards drink! And it tastes way better than when you dropped a stick of Land O Lakes in your Budweiser at home!
Even more shocking, guests there will wait in line for 45 minutes in the heat to get into a SHOP. Seriously. A shop. Why? Because it's Ollivander's wand shop. Here it is in the movie, in case you've been living under a rock. Now get a load of this picture I snapped at Universal's version:
I never thought I'd say this, but Universal actually made it even cooler than in the movie. And Hell just ordered a shipment of parkas.
They even pick young wizards for a show to help them find their wands. (Spoiler alert: Don't watch this if you want to be surprised when you go.)
Two words: A-mazing.
So it's no surprise that when they take people into the next room and sell them expensive sticks that do nothing, people grab them up like mad. It's part of the experience.
Of course, Disney has been doing this sort of thing for ages. Like when Disney's top-grossing Toy Story film franchise featured a cool restaurant called Pizza Planet, they knew people would want to experience it in real life. I certainly did. From the first time I saw Toy Story as a wee yeti, I was dying to visit Pizza Planet and spend all my money there. If only it were real….
Every kid's dream, right? Well, Disney made my dream come true, faithfully recreating Pizza Planet down to the last detail.
Well, there were a few budget cuts.
But hey! Remember those really cool robot sentries at the entrance in the movie?
Yeah! Those are there:
…in one form or another.
And the interior was recreated faithfully, to look just like the movie. See, here are the walls in the movie:
And here they are in the parks:
Exactly the same. See?
Oh! And they also added Buzz and Woody.
…and then they took down Woody. But no one will notice that Buzz is off-center. It's Buzz! And as we all know, Buzz equals theming.
Seriously, I don't understand why DHS doesn't get more love. With theming like this, who could possibly resist?